"Everything turns into awkward turtle."

Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever be able to survive without caffeine. If maybe the agonies I had to spend during the four years without it was a blip, and maybe it won't really be like that. But then I spend more than a day without it and my brain gets wired, feels like my thoughts are on an express train that just won't stop. And then I drink enough caffeine (four shots of espresso topped off with hot water, cans of Red Bull, half a box of chocolate covered coffee beans, cup of coffee) and suddenly I'm Zen. It's like bullet time; my thoughts slow down so I don't feel like my brain is always racing to catch up, doubling back to understand what's going on in my head. It feels so good when everything quietens down, I can sit still, and the world feels peaceful.

Rachel can't be right about why, surely. It makes sense, but it's yet another label that I can do without.